Being gay as a gift

After reading Davey Wavey's latest entry, I begin to relate how being gay is a gift to myself.

While being gay doesn’t define me as a person, it has helped mold me into the person that I am today. I’ve been asked many times before “if you could take a pill to turn straight…” and the answer has always been “No, I wouldn’t”.

Reason being mainly because without the internal struggles I’ve experienced, and the struggles of coming out and finding myself, I wouldn’t be the person I am today.

I'm not just another gay guy after all.

I had never thought about my sexuality as a gift. But I tend to agree. Straight people know that they are straight and there is a certain way that they are expected to act, but we must find our own way, and decipher what we think is right for ourselves. Being open to myself for three years now allows me to find the balance in my own way of living and doing things that I feel is right for myself.

Just fuck and keep quiet!

'So me and Geoff were having brunch at the cafe next to my office and this cute hunky guy walked passed us and so ofcourse we exchanged a few glances.

"Arghhh his bulge from his pants reminds me of Brat (not his real name), my regular fuckbuddy who only fucks and kept his mouth shut." said geoff with his mouth full.

10 seconds ago we were talking about how to increase sales in the club.

So this was his story with Brad which replaces the sales conversation for the entire meal:

Two Sundays ago, Geoff received a text from my on-and-off fuckbuddy Brat while watching The Nanny.

Brad texted: "Keen?"

His question can mean only one thing. That little four-letter word has a life of its own and a special place in any dictionary for any gay men. And i love how some of us have come up with special code-phrases to ask our fuckbuddies out when we're horny-and-want-to-get-off.

So Geoff invited him over to his place as he was horny-and-want-to-get-off, too.

Brat arrived, looking tired. A little moody. Probably jetlag, he figured.

"Actually, i wouldn't have assumed jetlag if he didn't tell me, only on our third meeting, that he was an air steward. Before that, he was extremely reluctant to talk about anything other than what we were going to do."

It was the fifth meeting, and all geoff know is his name, age and occupation. And he only uses one kindof lube only found in Australia. And that's about it.

This has yet to happen to me but it left me wonder, isn't it theoretically weird, knowing so little about the person I share my bed with, who might wake up in the night and rob me blind, or set my apartment on fire?

It's not about being paranoid. After all, being a good fuck and a psycho aren't mutually exclusive.

Personally if i were Geoff i would feel disgustingly embarrassed when the guy i just slept with minutes ago snapped. "You like to ask alot of questions. hor"

I'm confused. Sexually confused. It didn't help to be out and only out for nearly 2 years and wasn't sure if getting to know your fuck buddy taboo? Perhaps I have not had enough fuckbuddies until being in a stable relationship now.

So this is what i think, our sexuality - always something to hide and be wary about, possibly to our career, or relations with family and friends to remain anonymous and herding us into an unfriendliness and distance we must maintain with our fuckbuddies while at the same time fulfilling our needs.

Or perhaps there is also the fear of being disappointed Brat used to experience.

Glancing..exchanging glances..

Location: Bedroom
Mood: Full of thoughts

Sights and sounds: It's Amazing, Jem

When was the last time you've exchanged glances with someone you think he's cute and attractive, then looking away for a sec when glancing became staring... and this continues in the bus until one of you alighted and the next-to-flirting session ends? Sounds too typical yea..

*

This is especially interesting when you had a long day and to be able to exchange glances with a hot guy seems to be the bonus of the day!

*

For some, exchanging glances with the same person again and again led to curiosity and interest to that person and a good place to advertise your classifieds is Trevvy's C.A.P. (except there's over 4000 ads and he might not know Trevvy, or doesn't search on C.A.P., but at least there's a platform.)

Here are some classic examples:

1-Service 112 at 720pm

posted by Alan_Loo on 31/10/2008
We were on bus 112, boarded from kovan at 7+pm. We sat at the 2nd last row. We kept looking at each other, esp when I was alighting. You sat on the left side. PM me.

2-Guy at UOB Center

posted by crazydogg on 01/11/2008
I was with colleague and you were alone.We exchanged glances and you keep loking at us.Hope to find you here and we be friends

Find out if the regular guy u meet almost every day on the way to work/gym/sch/home is here!

http://www.trevvy.com/cap/index.php?catid=6

Equality is the limit, Sister

If you're gay, bi or transsexual, equality would be the last thing in mind that could happen in the near future, Asia especially as here's another sexuality-related issue happened in Bachok (somewhere in Kelantan,Malaysia) that left us wonder, are we going anywhere further?


Transsexual pageant raided

http://thestar.com.my/news/story.asp?file=/2008/7/27/nation/21935260&sec=nation

This is another obvious case of persecution by the government against a marginalised group of it's people who have done no real wrong.

They (to a certain extent, we) have hurt no one and cost taxpayers of this country not a single cent by living the life as they choose. The report on this Sunday paper cited: 'Men dressing up like women goes against Islamic Law'. Many, including myself would argue that it is even more inhumane to force these men to dress like men if they feel it goes against their true nature!

It's even greater shame when we compare this with the corruption and wrongdoing rife in most government institutions today.

Take telebroadcasting as a classic example, one of the reason the Media Development Authority banned scenes that project the lifestyle of gay, for example the programme that showed a gay couple and their adopted baby is because it "normalizes, glamorizes and promotes a gay lifestyle." Again, how inhumane and how far it degrades a society's moral values in terms of Islamic law, for instance it is to adopt and raise a child?

But at the same time, as the authority approves hundreds of movies and drama series daily featuring all aspects of crime like murder and terrorism to be aired, are they now "normalizing, glamorizing and promoting these lifestyles" in the country? Another equality myth busted.

And yet we say nothing and do nothing, while this country continues to vilify and punish transsexuals and those who are 'not straight' in general whose only "crime" is to live honestly and dress honestly to express how beautiful they feel about themselves and their life is.